Inner Child Healing &
Re-parenting The Wounded Child Within
Adults, who had abusive childhoods, and/or childhood's with neglect, often have wounded inner children. When a child's needs are not met, these needs do not just go away, when they become an adult.
I realised through my extensive research about complex trauma and child abuse, I had a very hurt, abandoned, unloved, unsafe, scared and severely wounded inner child.
So, I embarked on a journey to healing my inner child.
I also realised, I had to re-parent myself. I had to give myself all the parenting, I did not receive as a child.
It was a very emotional and quite scary time at the beginning. I felt awkward, embarrassed, confused and knew I was entering into a very emotional time.
I struggled to talk about this in counselling. I was in my 40's, and needing to deal with the hurt inner child within me. I also realised, my inner child unmet needs, were as a young child, and older child and as a teenager.
I'm a researcher (as you can probably tell by this website), so I spent considerable time, learning about inner child healing and the wounded inner child.
As I progressed through this inner child journey, I learned to play, I bought things a child would love, I bought cards to my child from myself - as a loving mother. It was very emotional. And at times painful, because it showed even more, how terrible my childhood had been.
The more I knew of all the many unmet needs and the profound effect this had, the more I knew how scared my inner child was. It also brought out all the emotions from childhood, I had suppressed for so long. Including, grieving.
I also figured out why I love playing with children. Because this was my inner child, desperately wanting to be - a child.
Safety - I realised, was my inner child's most needed parenting need, I never had.
See my blog for further writings about inner child healing, and the list of books for resources.